Estimated reading time: 7 minutes

Volunteering while traveling is a great way to travel on a budget, give back to local communities and make a positive impact as you explore

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Whether you’ve just finished college or you’re taking a career break, traveling is on nearly everyone’s bucket list. Who doesn’t want to see the world, experience new cultures, and learn more about themselves along the way?

Of course, it can also be very expensive…so, how do you travel on a limited budget? One popular way is to volunteer your way across the globe.

Volunteering while traveling is a great way to give back to local communities and make a positive impact as you explore. But it can be hard to know where to begin when it comes to volunteering abroad.

In this complete volunteer travel guide, we’ll show you how to travel and volunteer responsibly and the best organizations to get started with.

Is Volunteering Right for You?

Although volunteering is an incredibly rewarding experience, it’s also hard work. Before looking for projects to sign up for, consider if you have the following traits that would make you the best volunteer.

Reliability

Organizations plan each volunteer program based on the number of global volunteers that sign up. The volunteer project might be caught short or even canceled if you aren’t reliable. It can be a little tougher to plan a reliable schedule when you’re traveling while volunteering, so make sure you have the time to give before signing up.

Interpersonal skills

You’ll meet a lot of new people while volunteering from all over the world, so having great people skills will help you form friendships much quicker. Remember, everyone is in the same boat as you are, and everyone wants to make friends while volunteering abroad.

Willingness to learn

Whether you have volunteer experience or not, there is always something new to learn and additional training. You’ll need to be open to new ideas and processes, pick up skills quickly and be willing to improve as you go.

Problem Solving

There will be times when you have to think on your feet and solve problems on the fly. You need to be up for a challenge and willing to solve issues on your own. You’ll always have your team to fall back on, but problem-solving is an important skill to work on as you volunteer.

How to Travel Through Volunteer Work Responsibly

Unfortunately, there are a lot of scams out there that masquerade as a volunteer opportunity, so it’s important to make sure the organization you’re working with is legit.

Here’s how you can travel through volunteer work responsibly and give back to local communities.

1.    Research the organization and project

No matter how professional an organization looks, always do extensive research before you sign up. Here are some things you should know:

• The cost of signing up
• The nature of the project
• The impact of the work done up until now
• The ethical procedures of the organization
• Who the beneficiaries of the project are
• Where you’ll be staying
• Past projects and testimonials from other volunteers
• Travel information

It’s normal for volunteers to pay to take part in a project, and the money usually covers your transportation, accommodation and food. But make sure there aren’t any hidden fees that will pop up while you’re working.

2.    Don’t get confused by service learning projects

Volunteering abroad is different from service learning, and it’s important to know the difference. Service learning projects have agendas and research aims and are usually funded by the government or agencies.

You’ll often be tasked with a service learning project as part of an academic degree or job role, and you’ll usually get a grant.

On the other hand, volunteering abroad typically sets out to aid local communities and achieve specific goals for welfare projects. There are private volunteer opportunities as well, such as on working farms.

When you’re researching projects, don’t get confused with service learning roles on offer.

3.    Have the right mindset

Many people use volunteering as a means of affordable travel, but it’s crucial to also use the role as an opportunity to learn about new cultures and be of service to others.

For example, if you’re volunteering in developing countries, don’t judge the people you meet as somehow inferior or in need of being saved — you are there to help them move past challenges often caused by failures in governments and to improve their quality of life.

4.    Take action after learning

As well as personal development and learning, it’s important to actually take action. After all, any volunteer work aims to better communities, so do all you can to take action after you’ve learned, observed, and immersed yourself in the culture.

5.    Live like a local

One of the key components (and joys) of being a responsible volunteer is living like a local. This helps positively impact the local community and boost micro-economies. Luckily, this is easy to do on a volunteer placement:

• Shop locally
• Eat locally sourced foods wherever possible
• Spend time in local markets
• Visit local artisans and shop owners

How Volunteering while Traveling Helps You Grow

As well as providing you with an incredible sense of accomplishment, volunteering while you travel helps you grow in several ways.

Gain new skills

No matter what kind of volunteer abroad project you sign up for, you’ll learn some new skills while you’re there. Did you know that if you participate in marine conservation, you can get your PADI Diving Certificate?

Many more wildlife conservation projects offer certifications and unique skills you’ll have with you forever. In a more general sense, you’ll also hone some of your core skills, including:

• Time management
• Problem-solving
• People skills
• Patience
• Confidence
• Teamwork

Get a better idea of your professional path

If you’re totally unsure what you want to do as a career and you’re feeling a little lost, volunteering will help immeasurably. You’ll start to get a sense of what your passions are and the kinds of roles you’d love to do as a career.

If you have an idea of what career you’d like, volunteering is also an opportunity to test the waters and figure out if it’s right for you. For example, if you’re interested in zoology, you can volunteer for a Conversation Project in South Africa and see if it’s the right fit.

Make new friends and lasting friendships

Volunteers often make lifelong friends while working and traveling. You may make fleeting friendships while traveling normally, but volunteering gives you an opportunity to get to know people better, share a unique experience, and rely on others.

You’ll come away from the experience with lasting friendships with people you would never have met otherwise.

Develop a sensitivity to other cultures

When we don’t travel often, we tend to stay within our small bubble of culture and community and rarely experience how others live. However, this limits our perspective and causes unnecessary divides in the world.

Volunteers are taught about local customs, body language, gestures, experiences, and religions. All of this will give you a deeper understanding of different cultures, greater sensitivity and allows you to reflect on your behavior in your daily life.

Improve physical fitness

Physical and mental health are both important when volunteering. Many projects can be physically demanding, so you’ll likely see your fitness levels improve. Whether you’re looking after endangered animals in a National Park in Costa Rica or doing a charity run in South America, you’ll come back with a better level of fitness.

And the challenges you will face, both culturally and personally as you navigate a radically new experience, will fortify your mental fitness as well, strengthening your ability to adapt and feel empathy.

Best Opportunities For Volunteering Abroad 

If you’re raring to go and love the idea of volunteering overseas, here is a short list of some of the best volunteering opportunities and organizations that can help you get started as an international volunteer:

• Volunteer World
• Transitions Abroad.com
• GeoVisions
• Global Service Corps
• Cross-Cultural Solutions

Traveling is a fantastic way to experience new cultures, explore different parts of the world, and make lifeline memories. Why not give back to the communities you visit?

Volunteering while traveling opens up whole new experiences and allows you to develop a real understanding of cultures that you don’t get while traveling normally. Just make sure you choose the right volunteer organization and give your time responsibly on your next adventure.

You may also enjoy reading Explore More: Tips to Travel Abroad on a Budget, by Paisley Hansen

The post Volunteering While Traveling: The Complete Guide appeared first on BEST SELF.

Through Kids For Peace, youth are driving a global movement of consciousness and kindness, pairing compassion with action

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I admit: I am biased. 

I have been a fan of the organization profiled this month since it was created in 2006 by a high school honors student (Danielle Gram) and a former elementary school teacher/mother of two (Jill McManigal — my sister!) who bonded at a neighborhood gathering over a peace sign button on Jill’s lapel. What started organically as a small group of kids wanting to make our world a better place, has grown into an interconnected network of young peacebuilders worldwide.

Read on to see why I am so proud to showcase, what I trust you will agree, is one special organization worthy of our attention and support.

All the best,

— Joy McManigal, Youth Editor, Best Self Magazine

Imagine a small team of big-hearted and tenacious individuals sitting around a kitchen table working their magic to inspire 500 million acts of kindness, build schools and playgrounds in ravaged communities around the world, activate a critical mass of people to shift global consciousness, while overseeing 450 chapters in 121 countries on 6 continents. And did I mention that they also managed to break a Guinness Book of World Record? Phew!

This is the world of Kids for Peace, a global 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization based in Carlsbad, California. In true grassroots fashion, all this amazing work is done by mostly volunteers who share one unifying goal: to uplift our world through love and action. 

Kids for Peace programs and events provide a platform for young people to create peace through youth leadership, community service, arts, environmental stewardship, global friendships, and thoughtful acts of kindness. By sparking the innate talents, dreams, and passions of young people, Kids for Peace serves as a model and inspiration for creating this reality, not only for today, but for the generations to come. 

At the heart of all Kids for Peace activities is their kid-created Peace Pledge: 

I pledge to use my words to speak in a kind way.
I pledge to help others as I go throughout my day.
I pledge to care for our earth with my healing heart and hands. 

I pledge to respect people in each and every land.
I pledge to join together as we unite the big and small.
I pledge to do my part to create PEACE for one and all. 

What’s not to love about all that?!

The signature program of Kids for Peace is The Great Kindness Challenge (TGKC) — a grassroots movement to cultivate kindness in our schools, families, communities, and world with a motto that says it all: KINDNESS MATTERS (because it does!)

Working with schools and Kids for Peace chapters around the world, TGKC is a positive and proactive bullying prevention initiative for Pre K-12 schools. At the heart of week-long program is the belief that kindness is a strength that creates a win/win dynamic for both the giver and the receiver. By providing a checklist of suggested acts of kindness, students have the opportunity to repeat kind act after kind act. 

As kindness becomes a habit, peace becomes possible.

How this uplifting program came to be can be traced back to 2011 when the elementary school that Jill’s children attended asked her to help create a more positive, unified, and respectful school environment. As a result, TGKC was designed and piloted with three Carlsbad, California schools. Because of their innovative approach and wildly successful results, word spread — and a kindness movement was born. 

Last year, 10 million students performed 500 million acts of kindness in 100 countries. This year, 13 million students in 24,000 schools in 113 countries inspired over 650 million acts of kindness. Pretty impressive numbers for a group that still works around a kitchen table! ABC’s Good Morning America thought so, which is why they have repeatedly showcased The Great Kindness Challenge.

Another impressive Kids for Peace undertaking is the Kind Coins Campaign — a service initiative to empower youth to become global citizens and compassionate philanthropists. Working with Kids for Peace chapters and schools, coins are collected to help build schools and playgrounds for communities in need. 

To date, the campaigns include:

• Kinds Coins for Kenya — 148 U.S. schools raised $80,000 to build a Kids for Peace school in the remote village of Mikei, Kenya. Several groups of Kids for Peace volunteers have also traveled to Kenya to build the school and an infirmary, as well as replenish supplies and make new friends.
• Kind Coins for Pakistan — Money was raised from 157 schools to build a new school and peace center in Loralai, Pakistan. 
• Kind Coins for Liberia — Money is currently being raised to help build a health clinic in Paynesville, Liberia, a village devastated by the Ebola crisis.
• Kind Coins for Disaster Relief — 80,000+ students from 200+ schools raised money to build 4 new playgrounds at schools in hurricane-impacted communities in Texas, Puerto Rico, and Florida, with one more to be built in Paradise, California. Hasbro, Inc., through its BE FEARLESS BE KIND philanthropic initiative, matched $100,000 of the funds raised, a reminder that everybody has a role to play in creating a kinder world.
• Kind Cards for Paradise — $13,535 was recently raised to help an elementary school in Paradise, California recover from the fires that destroyed their community.

Inspired by social media’s power for good, Kids for Peace sponsored #DoItForPeace — an online experiment to shift global consciousness. The premise is simple: start with a group of 1,000 ignitors who do one act of peace and then share it on social media, inviting 5 friends to do the same. The scope and impact of this week-long viral movement is still being felt worldwide. Some people posted peace sign selfies, but some people chose to go big (check out the surfboard peace sign and first ever free-fall skydive peace sign!). 

A Kids for Peace event that always brings smiles to those lucky enough to attend is the annual party to celebrate a Peace Hero — a well-recognized role model who lives by the words of the Peace Pledge and inspires people to be their best self. Chosen by the Kids for Peace chapters, Peace Hero honorees include: Jason Mraz, Ellen DeGeneres, Stedman Graham, Ben Harper, Susan Sarandon, Tony Hawk, Rob Machado, Frances Fisher, RJ Palacio, and Jane Goodall.

Taking the message of peace on the road is another way Kids for Peace spreads the love. Every couple of years, Kids for Peace organizes a Peace Pledge Tour — a chance for youth from across the globe to join together for an inspiring trip focused on leadership training, community service, and peace-building activities. Past tours included trips to New York City, Washington DC, and Kansas.

Last year, an intrepid group of kids and adults went on The Kindness Matters Bus Tour — a coast-to-coast event that kicked off in New York City at Times Square before traveling to Philadelphia, Washington DC, North Carolina, Georgia, Louisiana, Texas, and finally wrapping up in California. Along the way, the volunteers spread smiles as they performed 50 acts of kindness while riding in style in their snazzy bus.

Impressed yet? Well there’s more!

Kids for Peace has interviewed celebrities on the Red Carpet at the Emmy’s, published 4 books written and illustrated by youth from around the world, and hand-delivered over 10,000 Peace Packs filled with school supplies to children in need. 

They are also included in the Guinness Book of World Records for creating the largest collage of cut-out handprints. This galvanizing action occurred during the 2015 Great Kindness Challenge when over 180,000 students each decorated one handprint to symbolize their commitment to kindness. Together, they created 104,108 kind-hearted handprints to brighten the spirits of patients and their families at the Dignity Health Glendale Memorial Hospital in California. A world record was broken with an inspirational and creative act of kindness — another wonderful example of Kids for Peace in action.

So, the next time you start to lose faith in the future, think about Kids for Peace and all the amazing ways young people are uplifting our world through love and action… and heartfelt acts of kindness. 

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For more information, please visit kidsforpeaceglobal.org | thegreatkindnesschallenge.com

You may also enjoy reading The C4 Way: Empowering Youth To Be Their Best Selves by Joy McManigal

The post Kids For Peace: How a Youth Grassroots Movement Is Shifting Global Consciousness appeared first on BEST SELF.

Exploring the generational perspectives of youth and adults on collaborating for social change

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I grew up outside of Berkeley in the 1960s, the golden age of Make Love, Not War social activism. Today we are experiencing another pivotal period of citizen engagement, often led by activists too young to vote. Anyone paying attention to local and national news will see people of all ages at rallies, walkouts, and town halls calling for common sense gun reform, among other issues. As the recent March for Our Lives gatherings across the country clearly illustrated, the fight for safe schools is both personal and close to home.

When I see or read about youth taking their protests to the streets (or the cover of national magazines), I feel a bit of nostalgia mixed with my optimism. Young people are once again on the front lines when it comes to social activism — but as any old hippie will tell you, it takes a village to create lasting change — a village of young and old working together to make the world a better place.

But what really happens when generations cross a picket line together? To explore that idea, I asked some adults and youth (ages 14-18) who have worked together as activists to answer the same five questions from their generational perspective. Here are their thoughts:

1) What is the best part about working with adults/youth in your quest to create change?

Mia Barbuto (youth):
 
The best part about working with adults is that they know that their time is up. They can stand by our sides and support us and agree with us and help us figure things out, but they know it is our generation’s time to create that change. They know that they have to step back and allow us to figure out problems ourselves because that’s the only way we will succeed. Not only do they allow us to figure out these problems, but they also share with us stories from when they were children trying to create change, and they subtly educate us without even knowing. They’re that wise voice in the background that subconsciously flows through our minds whenever we have to make a difficult decision. 

Fiona Beer (youth):

The best part for me is when they listen to us. Throughout my life, my growing adolescent brain has been filled with: “Your opinions don’t matter because you are a child.” Being able to work with such open-minded adults allows us to be heard by a whole new generation, which promotes new ideas that eventually will lead to change. 

Ruby Esposito (youth):

Fusing the two generations together to enact change opens up more opportunities for an even greater outreach to people. In my experience, working with adults has helped create a more powerful impact. I believe seeing everyone’s perspectives and utilizing multiple points of views makes for an even greater message, despite your age. I think this quote says it all: In unity there is strength.

Salma Ibrahim (youth):
The best part is educating them on how a lot of these social justice issues affect today’s youth. My friends and I were able to talk to our principal about how the dress code gives lots of girls low self-esteem because we feel it is a form of slut-shaming. She actually listened to us and by next school year the dress code was changed! 

Stacie Fenn Smith (adult):

Their pure excitement and passion for the cause! They’re hopeful and you don’t want them to ever lose that. At the March For Our Lives, in order to truly feel empowered, we had to step back and let the kids take the lead. We helped to get the logistics laid out so the students could carry the message. 

Lisa Hackett (adult):

Seeing their energy, passion and dedication. As a teacher, it’s always gratifying to watch kids mature into young adults. These student activists are such responsible citizens with an educated, thoughtful approach to their advocacy. From their creative posters to their documentary film vision, to curating a community art exhibit, their ideas are inspiring and exciting. 

Kim Snyder (adult):

The best part for me is that it is reawakening my best adolescent self with all the piss, vigor, risk taking, unjaded hope, and unbridled energy that inspires and makes stuff happen. They are also a reminder of a more open time that allows shared goals to cut through a wide diversity of experiences and is more conducive to coalition building. And they fight hard. They do not relent.

2) What is the most frustrating part about working with adults/youth?

Mia:
 
The most frustrating part about working with adults is that we’ve got them for a really long amount of time and then suddenly they’re gone. It happens in activism as it happens in life — you spend your whole life at home going to school while your parents take care of you and teach you lessons, then suddenly, just like that, they’re gone and you’re all alone, with no direction. In activism, you learn and learn and become your own leader and then suddenly you’re no longer the student leader, you’re the actual adult. You know it’s going to happen, but you never really see it coming.

Fiona:

Sometimes (not very often) adults receive all the credit for the hard work that the youth have done. It is not frequent that this happens, but it occurs enough that I notice it.

Ruby:

When it comes to issues such as school shootings and mental health among youth, it can be hard for adults to foster empathy because what they experienced as teens is very different from what the youth today are experiencing. It’s simply the difference between sympathy and empathy. I try to look past it as best I can because I know that typically their intentions are good; it all just comes down to communication.

Salma:

The most frustrating part is the fact that a lot of them still have some ‘backwards’ views. I always try my best to educate them, but a lot of the adults in my school administration and in my personal life still have a hard time with some of beliefs that the feminist and the LGBTQ+ communities are putting out in the world.

Stacie:

The fact that we have to march or even be advocates is the most frustrating part. Kids should be able to feel safe at school bottom line.

Lisa:

Fundraising is a bit of a slog. The other challenge has been in finding meeting times that works for the bulk of the students. These kids are involved in so many awesome things, but the drop off after the March has made it difficult for the few to carry out their plans and visions.

3) What can the adults/youth you work with do to be more helpful + effective?

Mia:
 
After the Parkland shooting, a bunch of students in my town automatically came together to talk about how we can unite the country without seeming like a threat to people who had prejudgments about the issues. It was amazing! A bunch of us got on a bus to go to the March in D.C. and we spent the day fighting for gun control and mental health awareness, but afterwards that spark after a terrible tragedy strikes, sort of went out. 5-10 people started showing up to meetings and that dwindled down to 1-3 people. After the Santa Fe High School shooting I thought they’d be outraged again and start coming back to meetings, but that never happened. I think the adults need to step in and be just as determined as that one student who is still trying to get at least 10 people to a meeting.

Fiona:

The adults that I have worked with have been absolutely wonderful, but they could do a better job promoting these movements and demands for change to the adult community because adults are more likely to listen to other adults.

Ruby:

I think it’s wrong that kids are not shown the same respect as adults purely because of the “you’re just a kid, what do you know?” mindset. Especially when tackling such huge issues as youth activists are nowadays, it seems implausible such young kids can make any change at all. However, that’s just not the case. The youth are more capable than ever, but without that respect from adults, division is inevitable. Respect is key.

Salma:

I feel the adults I work with could listen to what I have to say more and really consider the ideas that I have.

Stacie:

Keep on keeping on. Stay the course. Be organized, be persistent, and stay positive.  Look to each other for help and support. There is power in numbers.

Lisa:

More leaders need to step up, as high school seniors who have been involved with marches/protests, letter/postcard writing, and registering voters get ready to go off to college. Those that can need to take the steps to educate themselves about candidates and get out the vote.

4) What do you wish adults/youth better understand about you + your activism?

Mia:
 
Adults need to hear us because the times are changing, the arguments are changing, and the definitions are changing. There is so much miscommunication today with our phones and social media. We need to start speaking face to face in order to get the truth, understand the truth, and relay the truth. Adults, we want your wisdom of experience, we want it so bad, but we also want you to hear what we have to say.

Also, I want you to understand that my activism is not a one-week deal. It’s not a two-month journey. My activism will not stop until I get what I want. I think a lot of adults think that I’m (we’re) tired, but there is so much injustice in this world that there’s no time to be tired. So I ask that the adults carry on with us because they once (and probably still do) have the passion I currently have rushing through my veins.

Fiona:

I wish adults could understand how greatly these issues affect my generation. They did not grow up going to school in fear of being shot in the head when you turn a corner or the fear of coming home to find out your younger sibling has been killed in a mass shooting. These are real, valid fears and I think they should be taken very seriously if there is going to be any sort of change.

Ruby:

We are all working toward the same end goal — and we deserve to be shown the same amount of respect as any adult.

Salma:

I wish adults better understood that social activism isn’t a trend and that a lot of these issues deeply affect me. I feel that some of adults don’t take me seriously because of my age.

Stacie:

In the classes I teach, we have talked at length about gun violence in schools. A hard concept for students to get is that feeling unsafe at school is completely new. It’s not normal, although it has become a norm for this generation. I never felt unsafe at school. We didn’t have a locked door, or lock downs, or a single point of entry. We just went to school. This is a hard concept for students to grasp because they’ve always had fear connected with school.

Lisa:

I think the rising number of teenage activists is a key factor in fueling their fire, although adults sharing their activism stories can help create historical context. They can also provide education and empathy for issues facing a broader range of ages/races/religions/nationalities.

5) What unexpected thing have you learned about yourself + the world since becoming an activist?

Mia:
 
I’ve learned that inclusion is very important. Things people can relate to and are comfortable with are things they will listen to. If I go up to a conservative and shove in their face that guns are bad they aren’t going to listen to me, just like if a conservative came up to me and told me we need to arm teachers, I’m not going to listen. Seeing both sides is extremely important before you start shoving it in others’ faces what you think you know.

Fiona:

I have learned how to effectively get my point across, not to insult, shout, or get overly outraged at the opposing parties. To create real change and to start a conversation, we have to learn to listen to each other and compromise. I have also learned that the world can be a very cruel and hateful place. Not everyone is as open-minded and accepting as the people I have surrounded myself with growing up.

Ruby:

I remember looking around during the Austin student walkout in April and being overfilled with joy seeing the commitment and passion radiating from everyone around me. Despite everything going on in the world, this generation is bouncing back and channeling all the negativity into something positive and powerful. I’ve truly been shown that despite age, race, orientation, I am just as capable as anyone else to make — and be — the change in the world — not ‘some day’, but now.

Salma:

An unexpected thing that I have learned about myself is that I am very outspoken and brave enough to do whatever it takes to achieve equality and social justice. I used to think that nobody would listen to me. But I proved myself wrong. People actually did listen to me so I kept speaking up, ignoring hateful things people were saying about me. Something I learned about the world is that it is a very screwed up place right now, but if we all unite together we can achieve social justice and equality.

Stacie:

I feel more like a support person for the cause than an activist. Working with youth inspired me to be more committed to the cause. I also see it now from their perspective. It’s absolutely critical that something change and I believe wholeheartedly this generation will do it.

Lisa:

I’ve always voted. I’ve lobbied on Capitol Hill and contacted my legislators (although not nearly as much as I do now!). But these times are like no other in my lifetime. For the first time, I’m losing my Pollyanna feeling. There is a constant doubt that tries to sneak in and shake my core belief that humanity will triumph over evil. I find hope in the energy of the next generation, but feel disappointed that maybe their fight won’t be any easier or safer than ours. What has been most unexpected is getting to my age and finding us in what seems like the biggest challenge of our time: to preserve the values of our country.

You may also enjoy reading The C4 Way: Empowering Youth To Be Their Best Selves by Joy McManigal

The post Social Activism Today: What Happens When Youth and Adults Work Together To Create Change appeared first on BEST SELF.

Estimated reading time: 16 minutes

There actually is a formula for living a good life — and empowering youth with a recipe that combines character, choice connection and contribution.

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Young people today are standing up and demanding to be heard as they fight the good fight. By channeling their anger and hopes in proactive and powerful ways, they are showing us how to celebrate and embrace our differences by reminding us how much we have in common — and how much is at stake. We have so much to teach each other, and so much to learn.

I love the energy and optimism of young people. I believe in their potential to create lasting and meaningful change, in their own lives as well as in the world at large. As a parent, teacher, coach, advisor and friend, I have devoted much of my life to empowering and equipping youth, our future global citizens. If not them, who?

After 20+ years as a mother to four daughters on four different life paths, I have come to realize that raising children with a sense of purpose and direction is a lifelong journey. One of my daughters recently told me she considers me ‘a painstakingly good-intentioned optimist’. Hints of cynicism aside, I embrace my glass-half-full worldview. I want my kids to thrive; I want your kids (or future kids) to thrive.

As a parent and as an editor, I see my role as a channel — a conduit for insights, information, and inspiration. Although the articles featured in this section will focus on youth, they are designed to benefit anyone of any age who wants to explore the best ways to be the best YOU (aka: your Best Self).

I hope you agree.

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The C4 Way

Empowering Youth To Be Their Best (Courageous, Compassionate, Curious, Clear) Selves

All photographs courtesy of World Merit, a C4 Way partner

Dear Hope For The Future,

I have a very clear mission: to help you live a good life as a good person. Given the ambitious scope of this goal, I created a 4-step plan to provide a clear path on your good life journey. I call this roadmap The C4 Way.

The C4 Way Plan:

• Step 1 — CHARACTER: Good Life Values
• Step 2 — CHOICES: Good Life Mission
• Step 3 — CONNECTIONS: Good Life Goals
• Step 4 — CONTRIBUTIONS: Good Life Actions

Step One asks you to ponder: Who am I now and who do I want to become? How you answer that soul-searching question is a reflection of your CHARACTER — the collection of mental and moral qualities that shape who you are. Good character connects good actions with good VALUES — the fundamental beliefs and principles that guide your moral compass.

The C4 Way focuses on cultivating 4 core values:

• COURAGE — Be brave + gritty
• COMPASSION — Be kind + forgiving
• CURIOSITY — Be interested + engaged
• CLARITY — Be pithy + honest

The rest of this article will explore these core values.

Courage

I love The Wizard of Oz. Although Dorothy is my go-to gal, I have always had a soft spot for the Cowardly Lion and his dopey swagger and false bravado. While his traveling companions’ wishes were clear-cut — a brain and heart and home — his wish was much more nebulous: COURAGE — what it takes to confront your fears. 

Life is filled with things that make us afraid or insecure — nasty and intrusive things that tend to smother our good intentions like sludge. It might be something lofty like a fear of failure (or success), or something mundane like a fear of public speaking or snakes (my personal bugaboo). Chances are that fear is wrapped around every obstacle that stands between you and your goals. What evokes your fear is not the important issue; what you do with it is.

What I learned from the Lion’s journey to Oz is that being courageous means being brave enough to be vulnerable. It means taking risks and standing up for what you believe, even if you might be perceived as wrong or different — or attacked by flying monkeys.

This vulnerability can take the form of supporting an underdog candidate, rocking a crazy hairstyle, or backing an unpopular idea. People might not agree with you, but they are likely to respect the courage it took for you to speak up or act in support of your convictions. It takes courage to not allow excuses to latch on and keep you invested in behaviors or thoughts that no longer serve you well.

Let’s say you always wanted to play the piano, but never pursued it because you believed you would never be good enough to justify the time and expense to take lessons. Instead of yielding to your fear of failure, tap into your inner well of courage and find a piano teacher that inspires you to practice and become the pianist you always wanted to be. You might never end up playing at Carnegie Hall, but at least you won’t have to live with a sense of regret born from paralyzing fear.

Courage also means having the confidence to pursue a dream — even when logically it makes no sense.

This was my situation when I decided at 23 to buy a pub in Ireland. I had several strikes against me aside from being in a foreign country: (1) I come from a family of teetotalers (until my generation at least); (2) I had never bought property or run a business; and (3) I didn’t have any money.

Most people would have seen this as three-strikes-you’re-out situation, but I was determined to find a way around these obstacles. As crazy as the idea seemed (to everyone), it also felt right (to me). So I made a choice not to listen to the practical and protective advice of the naysayers. Instead, I trusted my intuition and guess what happened? I bought a pub in Ireland.

This story illustrates another one of my favorite non-C virtues: GRIT — that great combo package of courage and perseverance. Are you willing to stick to something — a task, project, goal, a dream no matter how lofty — despite resistance or obstacles in your way? That’s grit.

Ask any successful athlete/musician/inventor how they got where they are and they will likely tell you about the countless hours they spent practicing. When their friends were hanging out or binge watching on Netflix, they were at the court/field/studio/lab doing whatever they could to succeed, over and over again.

Grit reminds us that as much as innate talent and aptitude matters, effort and dedication matters more.

Ask any successful coach whom she would rather have on her team: an athlete that is wildly skilled but lazy — or one that is less skilled but whole-heartedly committed to getting better for the sake of her team. No brainer. As anyone who has seen the film RUDY will tell you, hard work and a positive attitude will ultimately be rewarded. Yes, talent matters, but demonstrated courage matters more in the long run.

The same goes for college admissions and employers as well. Schools are looking for more than just perfect grades and test scores; they want to see examples of gritty effort. Why? Because when school (or a job or just life) gets stressful (which it will), they want to know that a prospective student won’t crumble under pressure. They want to know that students can handle adversity and disappointments without giving up and blaming others for their failures. They want students that will keep on keeping on. They want to see courage in action. Calling all innovators, dreamers, out-of-the-box thinkers and visionaries.

Compassion

We all can agree that courage rocks, but so does COMPASSION — the fuel that propels your desire to help people.

Compassion has been described as having a kind mind. I like to think of it as looking at the world with soft eyes and a gentle soul. It manifests as concern for the well being of others, their trials and tribulations, their ups and downs. It means treating people (and that means you, too) with kindness and consideration. Genuine compassion stems from respect — respect for the opinions and circumstances of someone else, whether or not you agree with them. It is this kind of sympathetic understanding that can transform combative situations into collaborative opportunities. Compassion creates conversation.

A simple way to learn how to be more compassionate is to practice walking in someone else’s shoes to see things from their perspective.

You don’t have to actually feel what someone is feeling (that is empathy), but if you want to understand why they do what they do, try to be sensitive to where they are coming from and what they are going through.

I learned to do this in the 6^th grade. My school held an election that recreated the nominating and primary process of the recent presidential campaign. Long story short, I was the Republican candidate (Nixon) and I won (no comment). Unfortunately, my victory celebration was cut short by an assassination attempt. Really.

By way of backstory, my elementary school was for kids with high IQs.

One of the most valuable things I learned at this school is that being good on tests doesn’t mean you are good at life.

This was particularly true for Chris, the kid in our class who spent most of his time recreating Hitler’s blitzkrieg invasion of Europe. Glaring red flags aside, it seems that Chris was not a fan of Nixon; by extension, that meant I had to go.

So at high noon the day after the election, while we were both standing in line for the pencil sharpener, Chris tried to stab me in the neck. Fortunately, he was short and I was tall. The height differential, coupled with some quick reflexes, resulted in my hand absorbing the lead intended for my head. I was fine; he was hauled away. Crisis averted.

I never saw Chris again after his failed mission. I am reminded of our encounter, however, every time I notice the small remnant of lead that remains in my right palm. To me, this little piece of pencil symbolizes the healing power of letting go. In this case, that meant letting go of any feelings of anger or resentment about being on the receiving end of some twisted behavior.

To this day, I couldn’t tell you why Chris actually did what he did. I never learned what happened to him in his early childhood that created his inner demons, and I never retraced his footsteps while walking in his shoes. I did realize something important, however: None of those things were really about me; I just happened to be the wrong candidate at the wrong time in the wrong place.

My biggest takeaway from this unfortunate foray in presidential politics (besides never to emulate Nixon) involves FORGIVENESS — compassion in action with a twist of mercy. I forgave Chris for what he did. I couldn’t tell you if this helped him, but I can assure you it definitely helped me.

Life Lesson: Forgive yourself and others — for whatever. Just let it go.

Why? Because it feels good to release what no longer serves you. It feels lighter and cleaner. It makes space for new thoughts and feelings. Fresh starts for all. To forgive does not mean to forget. Stuff happens for a reason, so try to learn from the past. That way the bad stuff has served a higher purpose and the good stuff has given you some wonderful reasons to be in gratitude.

Curiosity

What is it that drives you to explore a new idea or concept? What is it that compels you to look something up on Google or in a book, or ponder travelling to a place you’ve never been?

That thing is CURIOSITY — the desire to learn and explore all you can, all the time.

Curiosity is the calmer, gentler version of passion. Both involve a spark of desire to discover more about yourself and your world. Unlike passion, which can be all consuming, curiosity is a form of engagement that can easily be broken into bite-size pieces to savor over time. To be clear, however, curiosity is not the same as prying.

To find your passion, start by following what piques your curiosity. What do you find intriguing or interesting enough to learn more about?

What makes you perk up your ears and pay close attention in a conversation? This is what curiosity looks like. Pay attention because these are the signs that will guide you on your path of awareness and life learning.

Curiosity can manifest in many beneficial ways. It can ward off boredom, like garlic to a vampire. It can nudge you to leave your comfort zone to connect to new people and ideas. It is also the cornerstone of a good conversation; without it, no new information gets in and no fresh air passes through the give and take of dialogue. It can start with something as simple as showing an interest and a sincere desire to explore what someone cares about. You hear someone mention their cat; ask them about their cat. You see someone wearing a concert t-shirt; ask them about the concert. It’s not rocket science, just curiosity in action.

As a kid, I loved to read mysteries. Encyclopedia Brown, Sherlock Holmes, Hercules Poirot, Miss Marple — they were all my trusted companions. But my literary BFF was Nancy Drew. I spent so much time in Nancy’s world that it felt like Bess and George were my best friends, Mrs. Gruen was my housekeeper, Ned Nickerson was my boyfriend, and a zippy Roadster was my car of choice.

As much as I admired Nancy’s home life and circle of friends, what I was really drawn to was her curiosity. Despite her young age, she already knew so much about so many things — and she was always eager to learn more. She was observant. She was tenacious. She was undaunted. Curiosity may have killed a cat, but it was the fuel that propelled Nancy into situations that more practical (or fearful) teenagers would have avoided. It’s no wonder that Nancy Drew is still a favorite of feminists of all ages.

Want to cultivate curiosity in your own life? Be a detective like my beloved Nancy. Start with a kernel of an interest and see where your discovery takes you. It doesn’t matter if your interest is fleeting or prolonged, obscure or trending with the masses. It can be a shared interest that helps you forge a bond with someone, or it can be a personal interest that you want to keep private. The important point is to find something that inspires you to think and explore.

The Internet is your friend when it comes to cultivating your curiosity. Unlike when I was a kid and had to pore through encyclopedias or card catalogs at the local library, today you can type a few words into your Internet browser and a whole new world awaits. Armchair exploration for all!

Want to spark your curiosity? Embrace your creativity and utilize your imagination.

Stare at a blank piece of paper until you get the urge to write down or draw what comes to you. Or pick up that book that you’ve been meaning to read and actually read it. Look up words you don’t understand. Wrestle with concepts that are challenging or difficult to embrace. No pressure to find the ‘right’ answer or solution. Just allow your mind to wander while you are tapping into your wonder lust.

Curiosity is your golden ticket to a good life. Without it, your brain can’t think expansively and your soul can’t breathe deeply. Without it you miss out on meeting interesting people and exploring unusual opportunities. Treasure it. Use it.

Clarity

The 4^th and final core value might seem like an unlikely choice, but it’s essential. It encourages you to ask for what you want and reminds you that people are not mind readers; they are not going to know what you want (or don’t want) if you don’t tell them. What is this value that I find so important?

It’s CLARITY — a clear and direct way to communicate with your self and others.

The words you send out into the world are your Best Self ambassadors.

They represent you and set the tone for your interactions in the world. One way to think of this virtue is to imagine that you are painting a picture with your words. My suggestion: opt for creating a still life or a portrait, not an abstract!

Clarity and brevity are the unsung heroes of good communication. When in doubt, opt for less not more. Get to the point. Cut out the fluff and filler and focus on what you are really trying to say. Don’t make people guess at what you are trying to communicate. Instead, say what you mean in the simplest, most direct way possible. This applies to verbal and written conversations. If someone wants more details they can ask for them. Otherwise, assume people have short attention spans and busy schedules, so use their time (and your words) wisely.

To be clear, I am not advocating brutal honesty. When someone feels threatened or disrespected, they aren’t going to hear what you meant to say. Instead, they are likely going to shut down and tune you out once they hear words that seem harsh or unkind. So speak truth to power — but speak with kindness and diplomacy so that your words will actually be heard and create impact.

A side benefit of clarity is that it inspires honesty — with yourself and others.

Being honest means honoring your truth, whatever that may be. And as Mark Twain knew so well, telling the truth is easier in the long run because you don’t have to remember what you said.

Clarity also encourages integrity, in particular integrity with your words. Be clear and accountable so that you say only what you actually intend to do. For example, don’t say ‘yes, we should do lunch’ if you really have no intention of having lunch with that person. Better to be clear now rather than have to cover your tracks later.

Developing a reputation as an honest and trustworthy person is priceless. Which brings me to a cardinal rule: Avoid the temptation to tell white lies. These seemingly harmless little fibs are the gateway drug to a full-blown addiction to dishonesty. You might think a little falsehood won’t matter, but eventually the truth will come out. It always does.

“Of course I love raw quail egg sushi!” This was a white lie that I once told in order to impress my sophisticated foodie friend. The fact that I had never tried sushi, let alone a raw quail egg, didn’t stop me from lying in order to appear worldly and adventurous. Actually slurping that raw egg is a memory that still makes me squeamish, as much for the slimy sensation as for the memory of succumbing to a silly and unnecessary lie.

Check yourself and your words. Trust yourself to speak your truth in a clear and concise manner, even if your truth is unpopular or challenging. And remember that it’s ok to say, “I don’t know” or “I’m not sure.” If you can add…”but I’m willing to try,” all the better.

Your character does not need to be defined by your past. You can change it. You can mold it. You can determine how it manifests in the world.

It’s a big deal and it’s something that you can totally control. So if you want to be regarded — by yourself and others — as someone with good character, embrace values that help you attract and generate good. It really is that simple.

My hope for you is that the next time you ask, “Who am I?” your answer will be: “I am someone who chooses courage over fear, compassion over judgment, curiosity over apathy, and clarity over confusion.” In other words, you are someone on the path to becoming your best self…

You may also enjoy reading Kids For Peace: How a Youth Grassroots Movement Is Shifting Global Consciousness by Joy McManigal

The post The C4 Way: Empowering Youth To Be Their Best Selves appeared first on BEST SELF.

Learning from youth activism: 3 case studies to guide us forward

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Who do you consult for guidance or confirmation to determine that you are on the best path? We may often look inside ourselves, up to a higher power, or to an experienced guru. Have you considered actively listening to the generation coming along behind us?

Are we listening?

Young people need to be, want to be, and are already involved in creating solutions to many of our most pressing and complicated challenges. Yet even I, as an advocate and career coach for teens and young adults for over 15 years, sometimes forget to pause and learn from those I am guiding.

Recently, I decided to delve behind the news headlines of several inspiring high school students to learn more about their remarkable personal journeys. The three stories address some of today’s most intense, hot-bed social issues that young people are caught smack in the middle of — natural disasters, racism, and gay rights. The life lessons that evolved out of our conversations demonstrate the sparkling reciprocity that can occur when we take the time to hear what the youth of today are trying to tell us.

Lesson #1: Reach as far as you can (and then a bit further)

April 25, 2015: Nepal experiences the worst natural disaster in its history. Do you know where your high school-aged son is? For the parents of seventeen-year-old Matt Moniz, the answer is on Mt. Everest, struggling through an avalanche.

The majority of cell towers across Nepal were destroyed after the catastrophic earthquake, which claimed over 9,000 lives, including at least 19 who were on Mt. Everest. When the boulders of snow ceased pounding down the mountain, Matt Moniz was still shaking as he glanced at his phone and realized that he had one bar of cell service. He immediately texted his father a message that he hoped would reach him at their home in Colorado.

“Are you there?”

That text would be the only message that Matt could get through for several days after surviving the avalanche and aftershocks that followed. Those three words, when received by his father, were a huge relief in their confirmation that his son was alive.

Matt has been an experienced alpinist and humanitarian since a very young age. In fact, he received recognition as “Adventurer of the Year” by National Geographic around age 13 and has raised funding for a number of causes including the prevention of girl trafficking in the Himalaya. He also maintains a captivating blog about his age-defying climbing accomplishments on treacherous mountains, including setting a speed record for completing all 50 of the United States High Points. Even so, no one could have predicted that his struggles on Mt. Everest this time would trigger such a personal transformation and awaken a calling.

When reunited with his father, Matt was presented with two airplane tickets and a choice. One would take him back to the comforts of his family, friends, and stable ground in Colorado. The other ticket would take him to Kathmandu, where major aftershocks persisted, thousands were injured, and many more survivors were suffering without homes, electricity, food, and medicine. “It was a really challenging decision,” Matt recalls, “I had already been gone for three weeks and had experienced so much…

“I was so stressed out with everything. But ultimately I needed to see this entire thing through. So I gave the ticket home back to my dad.”

Matt returned to areas that the Nepal earthquake left in total destruction. Along with his climbing partner, he assisted the relief efforts of the U.N. World Food Program and the International Organization for Migration. After several intense weeks, Matt traveled home and began rallying his community and others to send donations to nepalrising.org.

In retrospect, one of Matt’s biggest frustrations during the aftermath of the earthquake was that he was limited in how he could help survivors. He had no professional medical skills. As a result, Matt will soon be taking paramedical courses and plans to return to Nepal in the spring to follow up on the relief initiative that he helped found. His entire climbing team has also put their expeditions on hold for the rest of the year. Instead, they are dedicating their resources to raising funds for the survivors that need support and doing what they can to help people remember the needs of Nepal.

Matt went way beyond his comfort zone and continues to push himself.

The Nepalese people have literally lost every single thing they own, every single one of their worldly possessions, and they are still so thankful and grateful. That is what helped me realize that this is way bigger than me.  

~ Matt Moniz

 Lesson #2: Heed the call: believe fiercely in your vision

Only a few days following Nepal’s devastating earthquake, there was a different type of turmoil unfolding across the globe in Baltimore, Maryland. After the arrest and funeral of Freddie Gray, the city was experiencing a catastrophic breakdown of public trust that led to streets brimming with violence. Fortunately, there was another bright light, 17- year-old Darius Craig, bringing inspiration to an overwhelming situation.

The urge to take action started to escalate for Darius when he realized he was only three blocks away from a burning building. As a student leader at Digital Harbor High School, many students were turning to him during the crisis. While the media was filled with images of young black men, reacting to the shooting by throwing rocks, setting fires, looting, and rioting, Darius maintained a different vision.

A powerful idea came to him that would serve as a constructive outlet for many who wanted to get involved but did not know how to proceed.

“I decided, you know what were going to do? We’re going to march!”

He then urged his fellow high school students and peers to use peaceful actions that would show others that young people in Baltimore are “positive citizens.” He contacted several of his friends and told them about his idea for a nonviolent march from their school to city hall. From there, a groundswell of support started to rise from teachers, public workers, and other community members.

All the signs used at the march were made by students. Messages that promoted an Us vs. Them mentality were absent. Instead, they conveyed unity and peace, proclaiming “One Baltimore,” “We Love Baltimore,” and “Voice Not Violence.”

It was one hour before the planned march when Darius took pen to paper as more inspiration kicked in. When it came to deliver the speech, a connection to something greater than himself took over. Darius realized, “It was more than words. This was my vision. This is what I knew we needed to do at this time. This is what I knew about my city. I love Baltimore and I knew that I had to give the speech in the best way possible.”

Hundreds participated in the march that day. Afterwards, it surprised Darius that people were coming up to him requesting copies of his speech. When he looks back, he remembers…

“As I was delivering it, I noticed that more and more people who didn’t even start out with us became part of the crowd. It was so humbling to me that these people, who didn’t know anything about me and had no prior knowledge about the march, stood there and listened.”

“People from all different spectrums came out. Black. White. Christian. Muslim. Gay. Straight. It was such a unifying moment.”

Darius’ dream is to be a public worker and create a nonprofit to help the under-represented urban youth in Baltimore rise above the stereotypes.

I use my leadership and my voice to help others, and I think that, more than anything else, has pushed me. My voice has gotten me this far and I want to use it to help people go further.  

~ Darius Craig

Lesson #3: Be who you are meant to be and allow others to do the same

At about the same time as the Baltimore events last spring, a pair of best friends in Las Vegas, Nevada, also ignited a new conversation between Jacob Lescenski and Anthony Martinez, two high school students whose strong friendship and absolute acceptance of each other was captured on a video that went viral on the Internet. Jacob, who is straight, asked Anthony, who is gay, to be his prom date. The sign Jacob created for his best friend read, “You’re hella gay, I’m hella str8, but you’re like my brother, so be my date?” The manner in which Jacob surprised his best friend, and the authentic hug the two shared, created a media sensation.

Jacob and Anthony unexpectedly found themselves invited to appear on Ellen and highlighted in the Huffington Post, on CNN, and by Teen Vogue. Shout-outs to them from other celebrities were posted on social media and they were also honored at a Human Rights Campaign Gala for “opening hearts and minds around the world.”

With a gleam of enthusiasm in his eyes, Anthony noted that “It’s been a warm welcoming to see all the open minds and how affected so many people are by it. When this thing first blew up we would get tons of messages such as ‘Thank you so much, I just came out to my family,’ ‘My friends are now accepting me for who I am because they saw this promposal’ and ‘You helped me see how easy it is to be a friend to someone in the LGTB community.’” Jacob grins in agreement but also admits:

 Until I hit sophomore year when I met Anthony, I wasn’t for or against gay rights. It wasn’t something I bothered to think about or deal with and I just let people be who they want to be. Then Anthony became my best friend. I learned about the hate he received growing up and the issues he had to go through to get to this point.  

~ Jacob Lescenski

Both teens have been astonished by the support from the public at large. But as Jacob explains about the “promposal” moment…

“We didn’t know people were taking pictures or that it would be that impactful.”

Anthony elaborates further, “It was genuine. We weren’t trying to get popular. I knew Jacob just cared. That hug he gave me — it was a real hug. It wasn’t for a picture. I couldn’t have cared less about that.”

While the widespread attention (and over 2 million YouTube views) has been overwhelming, Jacob and Anthony are determined to stay grounded, true to themselves, and focused on helping others. They are continuing to stay highly involved in leadership opportunities at their school, including the student council, debate team, sports, and other roles where their service focuses on making everyone feel welcome and accepted. They are also dedicating more time to several organizations including aMasongraceproject, Zero Teen Fatalities, and Straight But Not Narrow.

Jacob envisions the possibility of a future where people “accept everyone for who they are.” Anthony is now even more assured that “genuine acts of kindness, whether they are big or small, matter.”

I treasure the life lessons reinforced from sharing time and talking with these four giving, brave, and resilient students. Each reminded me that young people aspire to be included in the current conversations about our society’s best path forward. The voice of youth can help activate others to rise up during an intense time when so many are stuck in fear or other forms of darkness.

All we have to do is be willing to engage and listen.

Are you there?

You may also enjoy reading 4 reasons we need youth as the leaders of today by Steven Culbertson

The post Youth Activism | Are You There? Messages From Our Future appeared first on BEST SELF.